Chapter 47: Why Did I Choose to Betray You

Heaven’s a Lie, Lacuna Coil

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The sun was falling behind the other buildings in Uptown. Ezio was flopped over on the couch in the living room, watching the sun’s rays vanish, half reading a book. He said half reading a book, because he was only partly paying attention to it, but of course, he’d read this one a thousand times already, it seemed like.

Books were like old friends, he thought. Old friends whose expectations never changed, who may hurt you, but always in ways that weren’t personal. It was a difficult thing to explain, even in his own head, and Ezio wasn’t sure if he wanted to think about it too hard.

As much as he hated to admit it, Lilith was right. Ezio couldn’t hide Aine’s involvement with this, or the bigger picture, from Morgyn for much longer. Morgyn was the only sage left that wasn’t trapped in magic realm, and Ezio still didn’t have a solution for that, either.

He didn’t know what to do, but in this situation, maybe he didn’t have to be the one that knew what to do, either. This wasn’t his fight, and he knew that. Morgyn would always have him on the blond’s side, but this was barely even his business, and the only reason it was at all was because magic realm was his home for so long.

Not that he made a habit of returning to it anymore. Maybe he should fix that. You know, later, when they didn’t have psychopathic ex-sage necromancer with vampire friends problems.

Ezio released a quiet sigh, and shifted on the couch. And then the door opened. Ezio looked up over his shoulder, as Morgyn wandered in, and smiled.

“Hey,” Morgyn said. “Reading that again?” The blond raised an eyebrow. The Restaurant at the End of the Universe had been read and re-read and re-read again. The covers were falling off.

“Of course,” Ezio said, marking his place and delicately closing the book. It took a bit of arranging the covers so that they didn’t just fall off. Ezio set the book down on the side-table, and then patted the couch beside him, indicating for Morgyn to sit down.

They had a lot to talk about.

Morgyn looked concerned, and then set the book bag down by the door, slowly shuffling over to the couch. “What’s wrong?” the blond asked, gingerly settling down beside Ezio.

“We need to talk,” Ezio said.

“Are you okay?” Morgyn asked, almost immediately.

“I’m fine,” Ezio said. “It’s not about that. I just haven’t been being very honest with you about certain things and I think it’s time you knew about them. I shouldn’t be keeping these things from you anyway.”

Granted, there was a specific order Ezio intended to address these in, and depending on how Morgyn reacted to the early ones, they may never get to the later ones. The ones that could threaten Morgyn’s life.

“Okay,” Morgyn said, still sounding a bit unsure. “What’s up then?”

Ezio drew a breath in. “Do you remember, back  in the eighties, when you died?” he asked.

“Uh-huh,” Morgyn answered, nodding.

“I didn’t hunt her down,” Ezio said. “She came to me.”

“Ezio I was never mad at you for-“

“No, hang on, I’m not done,” Ezio interrupted, holding a hand up. “I had every intention of shredding her whether she came to me or not, so that particular point is moot. The wording she used, the way she acted, it was indicative of mind control.”

Morgyn nodded. “Yeah, she was kind of loopy with me too.”

“The more we fought, the more clearly she felt like necromancy,” Ezio said. “And then I killed her, she burst into ashes which vampires normally don’t do. Creatures that have been raised for too long, there’s nothing holding them together but magic anymore, and they’ll break apart into ash or sand. She had been raised a long time before then.”

Morgyn nodded again. “So there’s a necromancer doing bad things, got it.”

Ezio breathed out. “Morgyn, when I killed her, Aine showed up.”

Morgyn stared at him for a moment, and then the blond’s head shook, Morgyn stood up and started to walk away. “Not this again,” Morgyn said. “Ezio, you can’t keep blaming Aine for everything.”

Yeah, Ezio didn’t think that was going to go very well. “I’m not trying to,” Ezio said, standing and following. “But you’ve gotta understand what that looks like.”

“She isn’t the cause of everything that’s wrong in our lives!” Morgyn said. “It’s like she’s the bogeyman to you, Ezio, please, just let it go already.”

Ezio’s nostrils flared, as he turned away, eyebrows furrowing together. “No, I don’t suppose she is the cause of everything wrong in our lives, but she’s the cause of a lot of them.”

“Ezio, stop it-“

“You stop it, Morgyn!” Ezio interrupted. Frost shot across the floor. “I know you don’t want to deal with it, I know you don’t want to pick sides, I know you want to believe the best in her, and I know this is hard for you and I’d never try and make you deal with something that hurt you if it wasn’t necessary!”

“How is this necessary?” Morgyn asked. “This is stupid and it’s over and done with and there’s no point in ruining what little of her I have left!”

“God damn it Morgyn, she wasn’t any good to you then, and she isn’t any good to you now, either. Burying your head in the sand and pretending she didn’t abandon you on your own to figure everything out without her, after spending way too fucking long trying to make you fit into a box you were never going to fit into in the first place, doesn’t mean it didn’t happen!”

“I loved her, Ezio!” Morgyn shrieked, the blond starting to cry.

“And I love you! This is the same as it was with Jackson! You hated him because he was hurting me, and I hate Aine because she was hurting you!”

Morgyn went silent, hands raising to cover the blond’s mouth, and then Morgyn loosed a sob, turned around, and ran up the stairs.

And Ezio looked around at the frost coating the floor, parts of the walls… and kind of wanted to die.

* * *

Ezio had gotten the ice out of the living room, trudged out onto the balcony, and fell over on the couch, watching the glittering lights below. That was why. He’d been right, it turned out, not to tell Morgyn anything that had anything to do with Aine.

He would’ve figured, by now, that Morgyn would’ve gotten past her and let her go. Morgyn always was a stubborn thing, just like Ezio was, and maybe right now, with things with Caleb on rocky ground, Morgyn couldn’t handle this.

Unfortunately, this wasn’t going to wait until Morgyn could handle it. And it looked like Ezio was on his own with this one. He was always on his own when it came to Aine, he shouldn’t be surprised.

Morgyn always did choose Aine over him.

As he watched the lights shimmer and twinkle, his vision blurred. There were so many things between them that neither had ever said, things that they had never dealt with for lack of the time to. Those things had gone and been forgotten, and then when something dredged them up, neither of them had any idea what to do with all of it.

Well, one thing was for sure, Morgyn couldn’t be counted on in the fight against Aine. He and Lilith would have to figure out what to do without the idiot.

Ezio didn’t think it would go well. But, just once, he wished Morgyn would take his side.

The balcony door opened, and closed. Ezio raised his head to look over his shoulder at the door. The particular shades of the blur over there, blurs, there were two, indicated it was Drake and Cassandra. Ezio laid back down.

“Oh, Ezio…” Cassandra said softly.

Drake shuffled over, gently picking Ezio up and sitting down, then laying Ezio back down in his lap. Ezio shifted around and hugged him. Cassandra wandered over, and laid down against him, lying her head on his hip.

None of them said anything, for a long time. Ezio sniffled and hiccuped, Drake gently pet his hair, and Cassandra rubbed his back. Ezio didn’t know what he’d do without these two. He thought he’d be very lost without them, and what amazed him the most, was that they’d just fallen into this on accident.

“This hurts,” Ezio said, between breaths. It didn’t need to be said that they’d heard it. The Fengs probably heard it.

“I know,” Drake said quietly, still running his fingers through blackened waves. “Morgyn will come around.”

“If the idiot’s not accepted it by now,” Ezio said, “I don’t know that it’ll ever happen.”

“It’ll work out,” Cassandra said. “You two love each other too much not to work it out eventually.”

With most things, Ezio would agree with her. They did love one another, very much, and they’d made it through everything else that life had ever thrown at them, and everything they’d ever thrown at each other. But it was a little different this time.

Ezio had let it go. That penchant Morgyn had for choosing Aine over him. But now that the blond had done it, yet again, decades later, it’d reawakened all the hurt and the bitterness from before, and Ezio wasn’t sure if he could just… let it go again.

Cassandra didn’t need that. She meant well, and they were both probably right, and eventually Morgyn would see sense and try to apologise. But this time, Ezio had to find it in him to forgive.

But that was what happened, wasn’t it, when you consistently put other people before you. You taught them that you came second.

“Why is everything so messed up?” Ezio asked. He didn’t know. Because things were just messed up for some reason, and he didn’t know how to fix any of it. It was always him that had all the answers before, it was a little bit frustrating not to have them this time.

Drake released a sigh. “Because this is how Aine wanted it,” he said. “You know she was trying to pull you two apart from the beginning.”

Ezio snorted. “The only thing she wasn’t trying to do is kill me, I guess,” he said. He went quiet a moment, reaching up and brushing his tears away. Now he had a headache from crying so long, but he should’ve expected that, probably.

“Probably because she couldn’t,” Drake said.

“Really?” Ezio said, looking up at him. “I thought I couldn’t handle Aine by myself.”

Drake released a sigh. Cassandra giggled quietly, nuzzling down against Ezio’s side.

“I worry a lot, I know,” Drake said. “Too much. You’re a very powerful spellcaster, and you can take care of yourself, Aine’s just a greater risk than I’m used to you facing, that’s all.”

Ezio reached up, and rested a hand on Drake’s cheek. He leaned slightly into the contact, then took Ezio’s hand in his and kissed his palm.

“I can’t die even if you kill me,” Ezio said. “I’ve made it too far for that.”

* * *

If he worked on his paper the rest of the weekend, he should be able to have it done before Monday, and not need to worry about it anymore.

Ezio wasn’t sure if he could make that deadline, but on the other hand, he and Morgyn weren’t talking anymore. It was more because every time Morgyn came within speaking range of him, Ezio walked away.

He still needed the time to think. And brood, he was doing some brooding.

As he wandered down the street, headed back home after spending all day studying at Britechester, he went over his course material in his head, attempting to apply it to his term paper. He’d gotten the presentation done some time ago, but he hadn’t given it yet. That was merely because Ezio wasn’t a very strong public speaker just yet.

He was trying, but he was also painfully shy and occasionally ridiculously anxious and skittish for no reason. The monsters in his head, if he had to guess.

Ezio headed for Spire, but he felt something shift in the air. At first, he wasn’t sure what it was, but he stopped in his tracks, tilting his head, trying to sense what that was.

As he stood there wondering, a blast of psychic energy shot towards him from the side. Quickly, Ezio dropped his books and flipped out of the way. The blast hit one of the low stone fences.

“You sure are fast, for a human,” a feminine voice said, and the dark skinned, purple eyed vampire dropped seemingly from the sky.

“Yeah,” Ezio said. “Comes with practice.”

The vampire, whom Ezio presumed was Sarnai, smiled just a little too widely at him, and drew her hand back, throwing another burst of psychic energy.

Ezio flipped out of the way again, this time swinging his leg through the air and firing off a burst of icicles.

Sarnai lazily tossed psychic bolts, shattering the icicles. “Where’s the blond one?” she asked. “You’re not the one we were looking for.”

Ezio smiled. “Well, great news,” he said. “I’m the gatekeeper. If you want the blond one, you go through me first.” He shifted his foot, suddenly coating the flooring in ice, which raised abruptly into spikes.

Sarnai disappeared and reappeared behind him, lazily tossing shadow bolts in his direction.

Ezio raised his hands, pulling up an ice wall and blocking the bolts. Then, he threw his arm outward. The wall exploded, hurtling towards her as a series of shards.

She was quick, too, rapidly dodging out of the way of all of them. Ezio got annoyed, his eyes narrowing, and then disappeared in a burst of gold light and reappeared behind her.

She didn’t redirect in time, and Ezio slammed his shoulder into her. Sarnai fell towards the asphalt, and then vanished in a burst of smoke.

Ezio waited, until she’d reformed, and then instantly shot off after her. She moved, but he was right behind her. Ezio jumped upward, hit the ice, and then Sarnai slipped and hit the ice too. Quickly, Ezio raised the ice, just as Sarnai disappeared in another burst of smoke.

She reappeared behind him, and threw another bolt of shadow. Ezio didn’t move fast enough, and went crashing into one of the pillars, but he stood back up and disappeared. When he reappeared to one side, not far from her, he immediately threw more ice at her. Then she disappeared.

And on and on they went, dancing circles around each other, neither gaining the upper hand. Sarnai disappeared in bursts of smoke, Ezio vanished in flashes of gold, ice, shadow, and psychic energy going everywhere. Several bolts of shadow and ice crashed through windows in the apartment buildings.

Ezio threw his arm out, firing a burst of ice in something of an arc; it slammed into her and threw her into the side of one of the buildings. A burst of psychic energy fired back. Ezio formed another ice wall, blocking it, and then kicked the wall. Once again, it burst into shards and fired at her.

She disappeared, and then reappeared almost right next to him and fired a bolt of psychic energy. Ezio went skittering across the asphalt.

And he tasted it. Blood at the back of his throat. He had a time limit, and he knew that going into it.

For a moment, Ezio simply breathed, and looked at the ice on the asphalt under him. He raised his fist, and slammed it down onto the ice; it immediately shot everywhere, rising up off the asphalt in a wave, and slamming down onto Sarnai, instantly encasing her in ice.

She shouldn’t be able to get out of that. Ezio sat there, breathing, and then slowly stood up.

And the ice shattered.

Ezio’s eyes went wide, one hand balling into a fist and glowing gold for a moment. She threw another psychic bolt, two, three, Ezio flipped out of the way and then disappeared in another burst of gold. The last blast of psychic energy crashed into and knocked down one of the stone walls around the seating areas.

Reappearing right next to Sarnai, Ezio raised his knee, slamming it into her abdomen, and then roundhouse kicked her across the asphalt. She twisted around, flipping up and regaining control of her movement, and threw a tendril of darkness at him. It snaked around his ankle, and threw him into Alto Apartments, then into Landgraab Apartments.

Ezio released a shriek, as he hit the asphalt. He was starting to go a little dizzy, and the blood taste was getting stronger. He moved to stand, but another tendril snagged him around the neck. Instinctively, Ezio raised one hand into it and blocked it from tightening around his neck unhindered.

It burned, instead, and Ezio wasn’t sure what to make of that. Either way, he had to get loose of it. His free hand raised and shot off a shard of ice, but she lazily shattered it.

“It’s nothing personal,” she said. “You’re simply in the way.”

Ezio grit his teeth, as the tendril tightened, come on Ezio, you’re a genius, think–

Sarnai unleashed a sudden screech, as her arm went up in flames. Morgyn fired another burst of flame, rocketing across the asphalt faster than Ezio had ever seen the blond move before. Sarnai blocked that blast, and then vanished.

The tendril of shadow around his neck released, and Ezio dropped to his knees, gasping for air.

Morgyn fell beside him. “Ezio, holy shit, are you okay?” the blond asked.

Ezio breathed for a moment, and then looked up at Morgyn. “I’m fine,” he said. “Thank you.” It took a moment or two, but Ezio stood up, wobbled slightly, and then headed for Spire.

Morgyn breathed out, debated for a moment, and then followed him.

* * *

Morgyn followed Ezio the entire way up to their apartment at the top of Spire. Ezio didn’t say a single word to the blond, save one.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Morgyn asked.

Ezio released a snort. “Yes.”

“Ezio, please, talk to me,” Morgyn said.

Ezio didn’t say anything at all, simply stepped out of the elevator, and headed for one of the bathrooms.

Morgyn sighed, and followed, still. Ezio had a few cuts and scrapes, some deeper than other ones, from getting tossed all over Uptown and crashing into a couple buildings. His right arm was slicked in his own blood, it was rather uncomfortable, and the ache was going to grate his nerves.

Wordlessly, Ezio turned on the sink, and rinsed the blood off.

“I’m not sure that’s going to work,” Morgyn said. “You’re coated in blood Ezio, not just your arms.”

Ezio still didn’t say anything, wordlessly sitting up, pulling his shirt off.

Morgyn winced; some of the marks in his skin were going to leave scars, and there was a half ring around his neck and his wrist, from Sarnai catching him around the neck.

Morgyn pulled the bandaging out of the cabinet, and instead of saying anything at all, just started to deal with the blood Ezio couldn’t reach, and then bandaging the wounds. Ezio wasn’t surprised it’d turned out this messy. She was a very powerful vampire, and Ezio thought she was stronger than he’d first thought.

He didn’t figure chasing her off the second time would be as easy as it was the first time. It was interesting that she’d run when Morgyn had showed up, though.

For a long while, the two were quiet. Ezio wrapped his arms in bandages, once they were clean of blood and he’d smeared anti-bacterial medicine on the injuries.

Morgyn eventually released a sigh. “I’m sorry about the other day, Ezio,” the blond said. “I just… don’t like it when people say things like that about Aine.”

Ezio didn’t answer, just wordlessly continued wrapping his arm.

Morgyn leaned over to look at him, and then straightened back out. “You two were always at each other’s throats,” the blond went on. “Shutting it out was the only way I managed to get through it. It was hard for me, I loved you both, and I didn’t want you two to hate each other like you did.”

Ezio breathed out, and then snorted. “I’m always on your side, Morgyn,” he said quietly. “If you told me that Drake was out to kill me, I’d at least look into it, but you don’t do the same for me. This is why I don’t tell you anything. You can’t expect me to be honest with you, and then punish me for it when I am. You can’t ask for the truth, and then be angry when you get it. That’s not how this works.”

“I wasn’t angry, I was just, hurt,” Morgyn said, hands dropping as the blond moved around in front of him. “I was just hurt, and I lashed out when I shouldn’t have at someone that I shouldn’t have lashed out at, it was only once, I won’t do it again.”

Ezio shook his head, pulling his shirt back on. Morgyn could say the blond wouldn’t do it again, but Ezio knew better. Morgyn always did this, notably when it was about Aine.

“It wasn’t surprising,” Ezio said. “I always did figure you liked Aine more than me.”

“What?” Morgyn said, eyebrows drawing together. “No I didn’t, that is not true.”

“Then why did you always take her side?” Ezio asked. “Think about it Morgyn. You have never once chosen me over her, but you were always very quick to jump to her defence. I didn’t even say anything bad about her or accuse her of anything that time. All I said was, she was there, and that is how you reacted.”

Morgyn drew away slightly, frowning.

Ezio shook his head, turning to the floor for a moment. “How do you think that felt, Morgyn?” he asked, almost a whisper, and then he turned and walked away.

He didn’t care what the answer was. Not now.

* * *

The buzz of the street lights seemed strangely loud. His head was starting to hurt, and Caleb knew he was starting to get snappy and irritable, at least with Lilith. He pushed those thoughts out of his mind and made his way down the street in Willow Creek, towards one of the back alleys, his shoes tapping equally loudly on the concrete.

His eyes kept darting around, making sure he wasn’t being followed, one hand tapping against his leg rapidly, and then he ducked in a doorway. The back entrance to one of the clubs wasn’t the best entry, but it was the fastest way to get where he was going all the same, Caleb had figured that out a long time ago.

Caleb shuffled down the hallway, knocking on one of the doors and then turning the knob and shuffling in. “Hey,” he said, turning around.

“Same shit as always?” one of the men in the room asked, taking a long drag off a pipe.

“Yeah,” Caleb said. “Little more than usual. Give me another half.”

“Goes up by ten bucks, man,” the guy answered, leaning over and pulling a bag of something out.

“That’s fine,” Caleb answered, counting it out and handing him the money.

The man gave him the bag in return, and then watched him for a moment. “You jittery as fuck dude,” he said. “You want this joint, too? I’ll throw it in for free.”

Caleb looked up at him, and then breathed out and nodded. “Yeah, thanks.”

The man handed him the joint on the coffee table, and went back to his pipe. “See ya next week.”

“Who’s playing today?” Caleb asked, pulling out a lighter.

“Don’t know,” the man answered. “Some group from San My, I haven’t heard their name before.”

Caleb lit the joint, taking a long drag off of it, and blew a puff of smoke. Almost instantly, his nerves started to calm down and he could think better. His hand stopped tapping against his leg so rapidly.

“You stayin’ for a bit man?” the other asked.

“Yeah, probably,” Caleb said. “Don’t really need to go home smelling like spice.”

“Well there’s a dark-haired tall drink of water out there been asking about you,” the man answered. “Don’t know what her name is. She said something about hell when I asked.”

Caleb looked up at him, and then took another, much longer, drag off the joint. “Figures she’d find me eventually,” he said.

“Yo if you want to just go out the back,” the man said.

Caleb shook his head. “She’ll just find me again anyway,” he said, and moved for the door. “Thanks.”

The door closed behind him, and Caleb turned to the left, towards the front and main part of the establishment. The sound of the music was loud and pulsed through the floor. As he stepped out of the back, he headed for the bar. He could use a Plasma Jane anyway, and Caleb wasn’t spending the time to go looking for Miss Hell, either.

She either came to him, or they weren’t talking.

He was only sitting at the bar long enough to order one of those Plasma Janes before he heard her honeyed tones beside him.

“Well, well, well,” she said, sitting down in the seat beside him. “Imagine running into you here.”

Caleb looked over at her, and then rolled his eyes, taking another drag. “You know,” he said, spewing a cloud of smoke, “I was under the impression nothing with you is incidental.”

Miss Hell wrinkled her nose as the smoke wafted over to her. “Depends,” she said. “It’s not like I was looking for you or anything.”

Of course she wasn’t. “Since you’re here I guess,” Caleb said, “the fuck you want?”

Miss Hell’s eyebrows shot up so far Caleb was sure they were going to fall off her face. “Since when do you talk to me like that?” she asked.

“Since I was high and didn’t give enough of a fuck to think about it before I said it,” Caleb said. “But seriously, you came over here for a reason, I presume?”

Miss Hell tilted her head. “We haven’t seen each other in a while,” she said, her voice going slightly husky. “Maybe I just wanted to see how you’re doing.”

Yeah, that wasn’t what she wanted (she did realise she was the one that taught him all those tricks, and they did not work on him, right?). If she wanted to say otherwise, he supposed he could let her. The bartender set a Plasma Jane down in front of him, and Caleb gave a nod of thanks.

“Fine enough,” he said.

“I don’t know,” Miss Hell said, leaning over a little. “You seem different somehow.”

“Am I different,” Caleb asked, “or are you?”

Miss Hell’s eyes glittered in amusement. “Oooh, don’t you go doing that now,” she said. “You’re not supposed to be making me think.”

“I’ve heard thinking is a good thing,” Caleb said.

“How are you and that spellcaster of yours doing?” Miss Hell asked.

Caleb didn’t answer, turning away and drinking some of his Plasma Jane, and then taking another drag.

Miss Hell giggled. “Didn’t I tell you it was doomed from the start?” she asked. “No one can love you like I do, Caleb.”

Caleb glanced over at her. “You don’t love me,” he said.

“How do you know?” she asked, reaching over and resting an arm on his shoulder, fingers gently petting his cheek. “You’re the only one that’s ever mattered to me.”

Caleb looked at her from the corner of his eye. “You loved to hurt me, that’s all.”

“That’s what love is,” Miss Hell said. “Isn’t it? Just a beautiful excuse to get hurt, and to hurt someone else.”

“I don’t think that’s how it’s supposed to go,” Caleb said.

Miss Hell smiled, turning him in his seat, raising his hand to her lips and taking a drag of spice.

He wouldn’t admit how interesting that was, even in his own head. She was playing with him, like a cat did with a mouse, that was all she ever did. Slowly, and oh so deliberately, she slid off her chair and into Caleb’s lap.

“It doesn’t always hurt, does it?” she asked, her tone low, hands raising to his jaw.

“Maybe not,” he said.

“Your spellcaster, does it always hurt with that one?” Miss Hell asked.

Caleb thought about it for a moment, and then shook his head.

“Doesn’t it?” she asked. “I can love you like you need, Caleb. All you have to do is ask me. Even spellcasters don’t understand us. But you’re learning that on your own now, aren’t you?”

His eyes met hers, and he knew what she was doing, as she leaned closer… he could just give in. When it was good with her, it was good, and he knew it. She was right. No one had ever loved him the way she did.

But the thought of Morgyn flashed through his head, and Caleb turned away. One hand reached over and downed the last of his drink, and then he pushed her out of his lap and onto her own seat.

“Why?” she asked. “You know Morgyn can’t give you what I can.”

Caleb shook his head, standing up and taking another drag. “You wouldn’t understand,” he said, and then he turned and melted into the crowd.

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